When I say, “The Thinker” you might assume that I’m talking about the bronze statue of a very muscular, naked man sitting on a stump seemingly in deep thought. Well, I’m not. I’m talking about my youngest, Caleb. He is not particularly muscular, and he’s not naked on a stump, but he is forever in deep thought about something. Thinking…always thinking.
This morning was kind of a hectic morning in our house. It was Sunday and my turn to teach Sunday school. I also had a dinner to prepare and serve for a group at church during the noon service. I didn’t feel very well…and…Devin was hunting elk on some mountain somewhere so I didn’t sleep well. Then, to top it off, in the hustle and bustle of loading all of the food in the car…trying to find my keys…and having a COME TO JESUS MEETING with one of my teenagers, I walked right out of the house without my Sunday school notes! Of course I didn’t realize it until I was half way to church. So, I had to wing it.
As we continued our thirty minute drive to church, it was very quiet. No music, and no talking. Just silence. The kids knew they had crossed a line with me earlier and didn’t want to make it worse with senseless chatter. But unfortunately, their considerate silence didn’t last long.
Out of nowhere Caleb says, “look! There’s a Scissor Tail!” I didn’t really respond. Didn’t want to respond. I really just needed silence so I could try to remember what was on my notes back at the house, so I decided not to respond. That worked for a minute or two, but then he said (remember he’s always thinking), ” did you know that a Scissor Tail’s tail is twice as long as his body?”
I didn’t know that. I wasn’t even really sure if I wanted to know that or even if it was a true statement. And I really didn’t care at this point. All I knew was I didn’t need this conversation to go any deeper than it was at that moment because I wanted silence. Remember?
I acknowledged his question and answered with a very simple, “really?” Then he dropped it, and I got back to task of trying to remember my Sunday School notes. Then , out of nowhere, Cassady decided to impart some of her wisdom to the conversation and said, “well, did you know that an Arctic Duck’s penis is twice as long as his body?”
What am I supposed to do with this kind of information? Could somebody please tell me that!
I just didn’t have the energy to respond. I just kept driving.
Then, a few minutes later Caleb says, “mom, I was thinking” (here we go again) is it against the law to put a person in one of those pull behind storage trailers, like the red one they use at the church?” “well”, I guess”, I said, “people are not supposed to ride in those, so yes I guess it’s against the law.” Hoping this would satisfy his question.
Nope, it didn’t.
Then he said, “there’s no windows in them right? so how would anybody know there was a person inside?” “I don’t know”, I said. He continued to think….and think…and then said, “what if someone put a person in one, closed the door, drove to another state and then let them out, but the police didn’t see it, would it still illegal? By now I was exhausted and tired of thinking. Out of frustration I said, “well, what about this, what if an alien came down in his space ship to drive the truck with the person in the back, then let that person out in another state, do you think THAT would be against the law?” (he gave me a half grin because he knew I was kidding) “why are you asking all these questions? I don’t know the answer to all of your questions Caleb, and why do you need to know anyway?” With a deadpan face he replied, “I’m trying to figure out how to get rid of Cassady.”
There was one more brief moment of silence, then I busted out in laughter….and Cassady crawled in the back seat to beat up her brother.
***note*** I googled the Arctic Duck thing and it’s not quite that long 😉