When I gave birth to our first child, I was totally clueless as to how to take care of him. Seriously. Being an only child myself, I had little to no experience with children. I didn’t know how to hold him, feed him or bath him. I had never heard of swaddling, colic, or cradle cap. I had no knowledge of how to take care of a circumcision or what to do with that dried up twig thing on his belly button. And lord help, I surly didn’t know what to do when he cried for six hours every night. I felt completely inadequate and lost.
Fast forward 10 years.
By now, I was now a seasoned mother of four. By seasoned, I mean expert. A real an expert! If it had anything to do with children, raising them, disciplining them, educating them, caring for them or entertaining them, I was a master, a genius. I knew exactly what I was doing.
Fast forward 9 more years.
I was now the mother of three teenagers and a preteen…and back to square one. I, once again, had no idea what I was doing. I was no longer the genius mother that had it all together with four pristine children in matching outfits.
Nope.
I was now an idiot.
Diaper rash, bed wetting, play dates and class parties were no longer my concern. I had moved on the to bigger and more nightmarish things like hormones, dating, acne, driving and female melt downs (both mine and theirs). I was a mom, a best friend, a private investigator, a chauffeur, a counselor, a short order cook, and a referee just to name a few.
Fast forward 6 more years (man I’m getting old).
My kids are now 25,24,18 and 16. Yep, I’m still going through the teenage years. And guess what? After all these years, sometimes I feel like a genius and sometimes I feel like an idiot. There are times I know exactly what I’m doing and then somebody throws me a curve ball…and I haven’t a clue what to do.
It’s those times that I pray a little harder and listen a little closer to the one who knows more, sees clearer, loves purer and cares deeper. God.
A few months ago I hit a rough patch with my youngest daughter, Cassady. (By the way, I have permission to write this post.) It wasn’t a head on collision or a roll over accident, but it was defiantly a ROUGH patch. It’s times like these that I find my self digging through bookshelves or scouring the internet looking for advice on ‘how to survive a rough patch’ and in the end I’m more confused than when I began.
For weeks I had prayed intently about this situation and for my girl. Prayed for Peace, wisdom, insight, direction, when to speak, when to be silent, what to say and what not to say. Basically I just wanted God to step in and make it all better. We needed a hero.
During this time I saw Cassady’s self-esteem and confidence level weaken. She was unsure of so much, questioning her self-worth, even questioning God and His love for her. She was struggling. For me, as her mother, it was heartbreaking to watch. I felt helpless. I just continued to pray and wait for the answer.
Fast forward a few days.
While grocery shopping in Walmart, I felt a sudden urge to call Cassady and have her meet me for lunch. After a few texts back and forth, the plan was made for us to meet in the McDonald’s inside the Walmart I was in. As we sat there, stuffing our face with French fries and drowning our sorrows in diet coke, I said, “you know what I wanna do?” “What?”, she said, “I saw a huge display of Oreos over there by the check out, I want to get a bag and eat the whole thing.” A huge grin came across her face. She said, “oh, let’s do it momma!” I laughed and said, “oh I was just kidding, we don’t need all that junk.” “Oh, come on momma”, she argued, “we’ve had such a crappy week, let’s just go buy a bag and eat the whole thing, we deserve it!” I sat there for a second and pondered, then I slowly reached in my purse and pulled out a $5 bill. “Here ya go”, I said, She flashed me a big grin and off she went.
A few minutes later she came back to our table with the loot. She plopped the bag up on the table and pulled out, not one, but two bags of Oreos. With excitement in her voice she said, “you’re never gonna believe what just happened momma, I just heard from God!” I was all ears.
Her story: she was standing in line with her Oreos while a gentleman in front of her purchased a bouquet of flowers. As She waited, He struck up a conversation with her and the lady behind the counter. With a smile he began to explain, “I’m not in the dog house with my wife, no, I’m buying these flowers for my little girl.” “Awe that’s so sweet”, Cassady replied. He continued, “I buy flowers for her at least once a month, just to let her know how special she is. Being Christians, her brothers and I want her to know how much she is loved and that God made her special just the way she is. We want her to feel beautiful inside and out. I never want her to feel she has to go search for love and acceptance, or to feel special from some boy. I want to make share she knows how much God loves her and how special and valued she is.” Cassady’s heart melted at the sentiment. “Oh, that is so sweet”, she said, “I’m a Christian too and I think what you’re doing for you daughter is wonderful” “oh really?” The man replied. “Yep, and my dad is a pastor.” He smiled and reached over for her two bags of Oreos and said to the cashier, “I want you to put these on my tab.” Then he did the most amazing thing, he said, “God wants you to know how special you are. You are beautiful and perfect just the way you are. Don’t ever change for some boy or to try to change so someone like you. God has something special planned for you. Remember, God made you beautiful just the way you are.”
At that moment, he handed her the Oreos and walked away. That man will probably never know what he did that day. His obedience spoke volumes to a young girls broken heart. Just hours before Cassady was saying how She couldn’t hear God and wondered if He really cared for her. If He saw her. And now, not only was she was getting free Oreos, she just received confirmation that He, indeed, does see her. I just love how God works, don’t you?
After she finished her story, I said, “you know what just happened Cassady?” “Yes”, she said, with a sweet smile, “I just heard from God didn’t I?” “Yes, yes you did”. Then we partook of the Oreos from heaven.
Have you ever felt like God’s not there? Or if He is there, he’s not particularly interested in you or your life? Or maybe you believe He’s out there somewhere, He just doesn’t talk to you. Or you feel like your prayers go no further than the ceiling. You just don’t see any evidence to show he cares for you personally. I think we all have at some point in our life, I know I have, so you’re not alone.
I’m here to tell you, do NOT believe the lie.
You ARE enough.
You’re NOT alone
He IS listening
He DOES care
You CAN do it
Because HE is on your side!
Keep praying, keep believing, and keep waiting because you never know when Oreos from heaven will come your way 😉
Thanks for stopping by! I love you more than sweet tea 😉
Oh Tonya and Cassady, I needed to read this today. That feel like I have been surrounded by brick walls and a brick ceiling and that nothing could get through — even a tornado!!! I have just been reminded that God does love me, and cares about me, and the daily struggle I face with depression. Thank you Tonya for sharing your “sweet tea” with us. You are a blessing!
Thank you Sandra! I’m so glad this touched you and reminded you that he DOES care. We ALL need that little whisper every now and then 😉 thanks for reading 😉
Love this story. Please thank your precious girlie for giving permission to share. How He loves us!
What a wonderful message! Just read to my hubby and he is going to share as his devotional with his college class! Love you two;)
Tonya thank you so much for sharing. As I read the tears began to flow. As a mother your story touches my heart that God would answer a mothers prayer. Not just that he did it but how he did it. That the words didn’t come through you to her, but that God spoke TO her directly, in a way that she could not doubt that he see’s her and loves her. Praise God that he knows us so well and that he answers are prayers in such amazing ways.
What a great story. Thanks for sharing. Judy
Thanks for sharing this. I have tears running down my face as I read this. I have felt so alone and abandoned by God for a while now with what I have been going through for over two years. Thank you so much for sharing this. Please let Cassidy know that her story touched my heart. Thanks.
I’m so glad this post ministered to you Cathy! I will tell Cassady. Thanks for reading!