I’M PRETTY SURE THAT…
I’m not brave enough to wear an elastic top, staples dress out in public.
I will never know what it’s like to rock a deep dark tan.
Michelle has one tooth too many.
Its time for a pedicure.
Anthony Weiner needs to change his name.
I could handle an iv drip of Alfredo sauce.
Puppy breath never gets old.
Kim Kardashian needs to stop it.
A mixing bowl of fruit loops with whole milk at midnight is ok if you’ve had a bad day.
The left lane is not for slow drivers, it’s for PASSING the slow drivers.
There’s nothing sweeter than a newly bathed baby in a onesie.
I will never like plain water.
Chocolate chip cookies are gonna be the death of me.
I will always tap my toe to Lynyrd Skynyrd.
Business owners should not star in their own commercials.
I will forever regret selling my red MGB convertible.
I’m NOT a red neck…but my family might be.
Nancy Grace is the single most annoying person ever…period.
My chin hair grows faster than the hair on my head.
I could eat my weight in bread pudding (can you tell I’m on a low carb diet?)
Spanx is a sign from God that working out is not necessary.
I will never enjoy Sudoku.
A new purse makes the world right again.
By the ocean, I belong.
I AM ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE THAT:
There’s only one man on this earth that God created just for me, and I found him 😉
Mothering four children is my single greatest accomplishment.
I’m a terrible speller.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Laughter IS the best medicine and it’s free!
Worry is a waste of time.
A true friend is worth more than all of the gold in the world.
Cockroaches are of the Devil.
And last…but not least…I am absolutely positive that God has a plan for my life…a good plan, a plan to prosper me, not to bring me any harm, and a plan to give me a future filled with hope.
What else could a girl ask for? The creator of the Universe has a plan for me!
And guess what? He has a plan for you too!
Thanks for reading! Love you more than bubble wrap 😉