As I walked away from the choir loft that night, my head was spinning. It was a combination of, fear, excitement, fear, confusion, joy and fear all rolled into one huge emotion. Not only had college never entered my mind, I don’t think it had entered anyone else’s mind either.
During my senior year of high school I would listen to what my class mates were planning to do after graduation. Some were going to the junior college, some were going away to college, some had their career path all mapped out and some were still deciding…me? I just took life as it came and had fun with it every step of the way. That’s code for, I was clueless.
I had struggle academically, all through my high school years, barely graduating in the end. Although I lacked in academics, I excelled socially. I was a cheer leader, class favorite, best dressed, class officer, and in the homecoming court for two years. I laughed, snickered, passed notes, flirted and made friends with everyone I met. I am sure I was every teachers nightmare. But it really didn’t matter to me…because I was having fun…always having fun. I loved every minute of high school!
After I had made this impromptu, life altering decision in 3.6 seconds to go to Central Bible College, the first thing I wanted to do was go straight home to tell my mom. Now that I think back on it, I’m sure she must have been somewhat sceptical but she never showed for one second. She was my biggest and only support during this exciting time of transition, even though for her it was very difficult. You see, I’m an only child, she was not only my biggest fan but she was also my best friend…and now I was telling her that I wanted to leave. Talk about bitter-sweet.
The next few months were like a whirlwind for us both. While my Mom made all of the financial preparations, I was making out my shopping list! Since, at CBC, the girls were required to wear dresses everyday to class, that meant I got to go shopping for new clothes. This was a favorite pass time for us both. Shopping for dresses, skirts, shoes and handbags along with all of the dorm room necessities had helped to dull the pain for our upcoming separation. As I have always said, a new purse always makes things better ;-).
After every item had been checked off my list, after all plans had been made,and after all of the good byes to family and friends had been said, it was finally here…it was time to leave. I had never been to Missouri. I had never been anywhere really. And had never been away from home for more than a week at a time in my entire life! What was I thinking! I was a naive, sheltered only child that had never been anywhere and now I was about to crawl into a white Volkswagen Rabbit with another naive girl and drive 700 miles to a town I had never even been to and go to a college I had never planned for! I was thrilled and nervous all at the same time. But somehow I knew this was right. I knew this was the first step of many, in the journey God had planned for me. I was just a little girl following a great big God.
There we were, standing in a grocery store parking lot, luggage packed and car loaded…now it was time for the hard part. Saying good-bye to my momma. It was a quiet, intimate, tearful time. A time for us to say I love you one last time and for mom to give me some last-minute advice about safety and money. When all tears had been cried and all words had been said, we hugged real tight, I turned around and crawled in the car and we drove away. Two excited girls with their whole life ahead of them. To be continued…