At the very tippy tippy top of my list, is of course, the most irritating thing of all:
1. Mouth noises! This includes, but is not limited to, smacking, licking, sucking of teeth, sucking of food, biting of the fork, chewing loudly, chewing softly and gulping. I think that pretty much covers it. Oh, and crunching ice, that’s a big one!
2. People who drive slow in the left hand lane.
3. A clothes hanger hanging on a door knob. There is no need to hang it on the door knob….really….no need. This is like nails on a chalk board. I could probably use some therapy.
4. Getting up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, only to find out (the hard way) that someone has left the toilet lid up, again! I’m thinking about super glueing ours down 😉
5. The “F” word.
6. When the “low fuel” dinger dings and it’s 14- outside, and I can only find one glove….and it’s the left one.
7. When one of my kids informs me of a huge school project, and it’s due the next day! This has happened more times than I care to remember.
8A. A dressing room with bad lighting. You know, the kind of lighting that makes you look like you’ve had the stomach flu!
8B. A dressing room with a fat mirror….that’s a mirror that makes you look fat! It doesn’t mean you ARE fat, it just makes you LOOK fat! I want to smash it with a hammer! If the department stores were smart, they would put skinny mirrors in every dressing room, sales would sky rocket!
9. Kim Kardashian. Let’s just make that ALL the Kardashians. Oh! Oh! Oh! And Linsey Lohan! And the fact that she doesn’t wear a bra to court! This drives me crazy!
10. When my daughter loses a library book that costs me $58.00 to replace. Then, after I have paid for it, I come up with a great idea to buy a replacement book on Amazon for $1.95 and pass it off as the original. Is that bad? I can’t decide if that’s bad or not. Anyway, you gotta admit that’s a great idea!
11. When an automatic toilet keeps flushing every time you move.
12. When someone asks if you’re pregnant….and you’re not! Or if you’re in a store with your small child and someone asks if it’s your grandchild! Both of these deserve a swift kick in the shin!
13. Clutter. I desperately need to de-clutter! My mother would be so proud.
14. When I go to the little Asian lady for a manicure and she asks if I would like a pedicure too, when I say no, she looks down at my feet, with a disgusted look on her face and says, “well, you NEED a pedicure!”
Ok, I feel better now. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest 😉